Homemade Wendy's Frosty

The once and true Wendy's Frosty:

Method:

go to Wendy's  

purchase a Frosty

(and small fries, dunk fries into Frosty)

Sorry, I tried to make a Frosty at home, using my Vita-mix and all the correct ingredients, and no, just no. It simply didn't taste the same. Tasted like disappointment.  That certainly is not the flavor you want when the mind desires a Frosty. 

My mother in law gave me her Vita-mix to use for making food for the baby, healthy meals for the family, etc. It's very, very dope for making soups and ice creams, and so I thought "Hell, how hard can it be to make a Frosty, its just chocolate and ice and milk and vanilla?!" 

Its very hard, in fact.

I used two different recipes.  A "skinny" recipe made with 3/4 cup Almond milk, 2 tsp of cocoa powder, 1/3 a banana, 1 tsp of vanilla, and ice.  It tasted like unsweetened butt. The other recipe called for 1/2 gallon of chocolate milk, a whole tub of cool whip, and 1 1/4 can (huh?) of condensed milk.  I tried this one as well, but a quartered version of the recipe (as if I'm gonna make a goddamn barrel of something before I try a glass first, like come on.) This version was much closer to the way you would want a chocolate shake to taste, but lacked that indescribable Wendy's flair. It must be, as my husband reminded me, the constant motion of the shake machine that makes it so....so fluffy, chocolaty delicious, summer time sweetness.  It also wasn't frozen enough, naturally you could add more ice to it to rectify but, you feel me, it just wasn't the same.  

You win this round, Wendy's.